Tuesday, June 15, 2010

The real, real housewives.

Lately, maybe it's just me making stuff up, but lately I have been noticing a lot of "campaigning" for a certain breed of woman. A gossiping sort of girl. A desperately unsatisfied lady. Even a downright petty and mindless caliber of female.

Is a reality television show really a reality when the people in it are uncommonly viperous, frivolously wealthy, and without human concern?

What kind of woman am I buying with my time?

Alright, I know I could write the most boring reality TV show about what a good housewife really does.

It would document women who now spend their premarital haircare budget on diapers.

Whole episodes could be devoted to the mysterious capacities of women; their ability to understand babbling toddlers, juggle numerous responsibilities, and retain positivity without the pats on the back for their accomplishments.

I can think of plenty of women who would be both worthy of our attention and too humble to ask for it.

"Popular culture today often makes women look silly, inconsequential, mindless, and powerless. It objectifies them and disrespects them and then suggests that they are able to leave their mark on mankind only by seduction... And so, my dear young women, with all my heart I urge you not to look to contemporary culture for your role models and mentors." -M. Russel Ballard

Alright. Well. I know full-well that when I watch a show with ridiculous women I do not ever flat out say to myself; "Boy, she is my role model!" But I do catch myself thinking things like, "oh, I love what she's wearing" or "wouldn't it be nice to be able to do that" or even "my situation is not at all as cool." Slowly, my ideas of what women should be are altered.

"It is not for you to be led by the women of the world; it is for you to lead the women of the world, in everything that is praise-worthy, everything that is God-like, everything that is uplifting and purifying to the children of men." -Joseph F. Smith

Lost in a broadcast of cheep cattiness are the attributes of womankind that are truly noteworthy. I know so many women of remarkable selflessness, compassion for others, and passion for life. I would be hard pressed to find a real woman whose conversational topics of choice are shopping and sex. Honestly.

"There is nothing in this world as personal, as nurturing, or as life changing as the influence of righteous women." -M. Russell Ballard

I daresay suffragettes would shudder upon witnessing a legacy of empowered women dwindle into a foolish mockery of femininity.

Well, I think. I think. I think that I will take more care in who I allow to influence my behavior and character as a lady. Especially given the weighty task I have of teaching a house full of boys what a woman really is.

I think that next time I watch a movie that paints a female heroine as cold and intrinsic, I will turn it off.

And I will summon, through the magic of blogging, some beautiful women that inspire me; Aproapealb Margaret Emily and Whitney.

Thank you for keeping it real and reminding me to do the same.

17 comments:

Matthew James said...

I love you! Thanks for being such a great REAL housewife and not some vicious vixen.

Brieanna said...

I love the real housewives shows. Maybe I'm completely desensitized to the media or whatever, but I would never want to be any of those women, they're all ridiculous. I get what you're saying, however, women are too precious to be represented in such an unflattering light. When I watch the show, I do it to live vicariously through carefully edited conflicts and comments, it is not real at all. I could see how it would be negative if one was easily influenced but it's really pretty silly stuff.

Megan said...

I can't tell you how much I needed this post! I've been going through the same stuff in my head. I even came to the conclusion to throw out my glamour magazines and remove the reality tv from my netflix. Thank you for posting!

emily said...

oh i love this. everything about it. i too find myself doing the same things--- thinking if only i had those clothes or could have that talent... but then i remember that i am just me and i need to work with what i have. i love that part about mothers being able to understand babbling toddlers- i definitely don't have that talent yet :)
and i love the quotes you chose. especially that about not choosing pop culture people as role models. doing so is dangerous in so many ways.
tv shows are designed for audiences to wish they had what they see...

i bet your reality tv show would actually be real and totally fascinating. hehe.

p.s. thanks for the shout out :) you inspire me too...

Trapper and Suzy said...

I'm faced with the same task: teaching my boys what a real woman is all about and to respect women. I find myself being more crude or silly than my husband sometimes. It's actually been my mother's lifelong struggle to get me to be more lady-like. So, I promise to myself that I will be a more refined woman for my boys. : )

Mandy said...

I am so annoyed by "reality" television housewives that are catty, vapid, money-hungry, designer-bag-toting airheads who would rather spend time at the mall than with their families! Even on the Real Housewives of Atlanta, they had one "housewife" who supposedly spent her free time to sponsor a battered women's shelter because she was in an abusive relationship as a young woman... What I found to be so hypocritical about it was that in the next sentence, she's spewing negative comments about a "friend" of hers parenting and image behind her back. Is that not abuse? Is that not unwanted pain? Is that not battery?
So then there's Jon and Kate Plus 8 (pre-minus-Jon.) I thought, "Wow, so here's what a big family that lives in a rational budget kind of looks like, this may be worth watching." And what I do I see? Plastic surgery, paparazzi and Kate's constant bickering and nagging at her husband. Jon's in ability to connect with her regarding anything else but their children. Try again.
I've given up on television. I'm gonna start living the things I really want to see.
Great post, bravo!

Mrs. Blimes said...

Beautifully said M. I love your posts and how they always open my eyes to see differently!

Domesticated-Bliss said...

I love this post - well said!

Christy said...

Another wonderful post! You have brightened my day! :)

jdavissquared said...

Absolutely true!

Aimee said...

Well Said!

Brieanna said...

I just wanted to point out that people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Nobody's perfect, here we are talking about how silly or "vapid," these women are when that is what we're complaining about. We're all guilty of being hypocrites sometimes and we have the power to choose what we think, it's so easy to blame it on everyone outside ourselves.

aproapealb said...

Thank you so very much! I felt very very honored to see my name at the end of this post. Although I think that you are the real inspiration! Your blog is a big source of good decisions and right atitudes that I have towards life.
I love the views you have and the way you price true feminity. I'm so happy I found you!

Megan Marie said...

Brie, you make a good point. I would hate a conversation about morals and values to degenerate into a bashing of specific individuals. There is so much beauty in each woman. Sooooo much to celebrate about every individual. I have spoken before about how we each have faults and weaknesses and we are to take each other by the hands. Leading others to an understanding of their personal value requires first a recognition of their true worth as women. Like I said, good point, Brie.

prettybaby said...

i do watch housewives, and i'd be lying if i'd promise to stop. honestly, it makes me laugh. not that i'm making fun of them but the bickering is so silly! back and forth back and forth...! i think it's not really fair to think "we know" them. if someone were to film me and then put what they choose on tv... you can bet it'd be my worst moments because that's what they want on tv, so how fair is that? i think that's one thing we need to remember... it's not reality, because A) they edit it for good tv and B) they know the cameras are there!

anyway, you are lovely. xx

Jessica Bjorn said...

Right on.

joolee said...

thank you, i love this post! love your gorgeous pictures and blog too. keep up the great work!