Sunday, June 5, 2011


"More holiness give me,
More strivings within,

More patience in suff’ring,
More sorrow for sin,

More faith in my Savior,
More sense of his care,

More joy in his service,
More purpose in prayer."

-Philip Paul Bliss

I'm especially feeling the 'joy in his service' part, or rather, not feeling the joy so much, just in a couple of aspects of service.

But then I think about Josie, who sang me an entire song from her 4th-grade choir concert after church today. Or Chloe and Jenna, who draw and deliver pictures to me almost every Sunday. Or Noah, who reminded me of something I wrote to him months ago that really stuck with him about his smile and the way it makes me feel better when I'm sad.

And that gets me thinking about Caleb, who acts tough but is such a softy inside. And Henry and Jonah, and Haily, who are all growing so fast. And the kids I haven't seen in a while. I miss them.

So, there's a lot of joy to be had.

I just can't think about staffing a Primary. Or working in correlated efforts with other auxiliaries. Or wondering what-the-heck is going on with this or that, and then getting irritated.

You know, lately I know the handbook of church rules better than I know the scriptures.

I need more holiness. Or less responsibility, haha.

The end.


Natalie said...

I know exactly what you mean. That critical/terrible/so-hard-to-find balance between the spirit and the letter and the "I can't breathe!" But the sweet glimpses of growth help with that. It's just hard sometimes to not get bugged. Hang in there! These are growing pains. Stupid growing pains:)

Jashley said...

I love that hymn, it's my all time favorite. Right now I'm finding it so easy to get absorbed in all the "stuff to do". I have to remind myself to focus on the people I serve and trust that the how I serve them part will work itself out.